Yesterday night, I received a White Day gift from a friend, a return of what I gave on Valentine's Day. He apologized for being 2 days late. I told him not to worry about it, as long as he still remembered it, I was glad. Really happy about it. It wasn't something expensive, something to quench my thirst for chocolate, a stick of Cadbury Chocfuls. It was not the gift, it was the thought that made me happy. Thank you.
Well, let's talk about what happened today. I had clinical today at HUKM at the basement record unit where the only reception working was Celcom. There wasn't much to do as we already knew beforehand what was needed and that just saved us so much time till the only thing I ever thought of was to get home and blog. Once we were let go, I went to have lunch at the outdoor cafeteria. Perhaps, I was so used to the things around me, to what I was holding, to what I owned and also to the idea of resting at home that I did not pay much attention and just let my body do everything by itself.
Once the bus was there, I was in such a rush and halfway, patting my friend telling him not to rush when I was the one rushing, then I knew I lost something important but I didn't know what. I couldn't remember. I looked into my bag and realized that I did not have my blue file with me. It is damn important as it contains all the patient's information I copied today to be passed up later and some other notes. I was startled and looked back, everything and everyone was in such a commotion that I could hardly get a good look at the table we just vacated. All I had in my mind was a blue file blue file blue file blue file blue file till it seemed that everyone was holding a blue file. Eng Wee was holding one but his was extremely large, nope, not mine.
I gasped and that caught two of my friends' attention. I told them that I lost my file, they helped me look around. See Chiat said maybe one of them took it and she would have a look on the bus while asking the driver to wait. Meanwhile, Lee Wah suggested we walked back to the record unit, I was so blurred that I couldn't have a proper sentence out of my mouth. I tried to recall if I had the file with me when I left the basement but I couldn't recall anything, I tried so hard. It just seemed that I had amnesia for that short period of time, my memory was blank. I told Lee Wah there was no need to accompany me, I could look for it myself and that she should not miss the bus. She insisted that it was ok and she needed to know where the room was to get there tomorrow morning.
I was really shocked over the missing file and panicked that I lost my bearing and I almost took the wrong route. I kept recalling my memory and at last, I remembered I did have my file with me all the way to the cafeteria and that I dumped it on the table before I went to buy my food. We went down to the basement anyway just to be sure. When we got back to the cafeteria later, Lee Wah helped me call Mei Fei as I had left my handphone at home. What a relief, my file was with Yi Ling. She accidentally took it. I almost cried out of relief.
I was so grateful to Lee Wah for staying with me and helping me out even when her feet were killing her. If she was not there, I would have broken down and cried. She said it was her first time seeing me in such a messed up state, losing my bearing, mumbling and panicking. All the while, I looked cool and calm no matter what happened, even when the whole mug of Nescafe was spilt onto my bed back in KTSN, I still took my time to wipe the remains on the table then only the stain on the bed when everyone in the room was shouting and running around fetching for tissues. I guess, it was because the file was very important to me and at that time, I didn't have my handphone with me that I acted the way I was.
I told her frankly that I was speechless and grateful that she stayed with me and didn't know how to thank her. I added if I were her, I would have left. That was me. But after today, I told her I would stay for her if the same thing happened to her. That's my promise to her. I have learnt my lesson and I will try not to be selfish anymore. From now onwards, I really need to open up my senses to the things around me and I shall not take my body for granted.
p/s: file=life
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